Sunday Oct., 16
11:45
Morning
Feelin’ photo-shoot fresh and clean in a Hope and Glory emblazoned brown tee, faded blue jeans and a pair of Chuck’s, I slipped quietly into the park like a rock star tryin’ to evade the pryin’ eyes of his adoring fans (yep, I know am delusional like that but hey, that was how a brotha was feelin’. Lol) As I expected, the joint was packed to the rafters
Are you wonderin’, “what the fuck was he doin’ at a park on a Sunday morning?”
“Was he there to perform?”
“Wasn’t his ass supposed to be in church or somethin’?”
Nope, I wasn’t there to perform and yep, my ass was exactly where y’all thought it should be…the church! The church is bum smack in the middle of a park. How cool is that, huh? Trees swayin’, birds yodeling while the M.O.G (Man Of God, jus’ in case you’re wonderin’ what that meant) drops the word of God in your ear holes…hella cool, if you ask me.
Like I said, the place was already filled with folks who took punctuality to church service more seriously than others. I grabbed a chair and sat my ass down under the biggest baobab tree you’d ever seen with them other late comers jus’ outside the big ass tent (serving as the church buidin’). It was testimony time, testimonies were flowin’ and I was lovin’ it.
By the way, do you guys know that more than any other days of the week, people look most beautiful on Sunday mornings? Ummm, don’t take my statement as the gospel though.
Anyways, your boy was so moved by the testimonies, my ass was tempted to go grab the mike and let loose a testimony or two. But then I thought, what was I goin’ to testify about?
A voice inside my head said, “testify about your blog, tell ‘em how thousands of folks been troopin’ there and shit”.
What! I can’t tell the church about the freakin’ blog, nah I can’t. My shit ain’t fit for church consumption; the church will definitely puke from that shit. Besides, am always snitchin’ on the church members up in there.
A crow cawin’ up on the baobab tree snapped me out of the lil dabate I was having in my head.
I got my concentration together and I turned my bible to Exodus 25 verse 9 like the MOG said. I did good for about an hour but the sermon was takin’ way too long, the heat was beginnin’ to affect my thoughts and my mind started to stray. Surroundin’ me were two nursin’ mothers, two men, some young ladies and a coupla kids.
The nursin’ mother sittin diagonally in front of me was a plus size woman, if y’all know what I mean, her baby wouldn’t stop cryin’ so she did what most mothers would do…she unleashed a portion of her generous breast for the tot to suck on…I was stunned, my head snapped away instantly! Gawd, I can’t be peepin’ stuff like that in the house of God! I felt put on the spot…I willed my eyes glued to my pocket size bible and left it there for the next three minute or so.
14:10
The Pastor doesn’t look like he was gonna shut his sermon down anytime soon, matter of fact, it looked like he was jus getting’ warmed up and that was two hours after he got on the mike! I’d had enough sermon to last me the whole week, I was blessed and it was time for to jet.
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