UNIBOOB!

Do I know Dinora Rodriguez?

Nah, I’ve never heard that name before, I swear!

Am sure alotta of y’all never heard the name before too; I can bet my bottom dollar on that... as if I got some! Lol.

Well, not anymore, bout two days ago I heard about Dinora for the first time and yesterday, I “met” her and ever since, I can’t seem to get my mind off her. Matter of fact, am lookin’ her right now as a write this, she’s right there in front of me... lookin’ all pretty and shit. Am checkin’ her out as she touches on her make-up, you know, powderin’ her rosy cheeks, shadowin’ her pretty eyes, glossin’ her cherry lips and whole works. She’s beautiful but she doesn’t “sound” like a happy woman, she “sounds” regretful!

Am lookin’ her boobs right now and they look like good food to me, all round and palmful. Have I ever told y’all my boy Kevin Soje used to call me Tits’ Man? Well real recognize real cause I call him the same but, that’s a blog for another day.

Dinora Rodriguez is a 40 year old American woman from Los Angeles, CA. whom I’ve been tryna get up in my room ever since I heard about her boobs and how famous she’s become because of ‘em. I know some of you will be thinkin’, oh Dobs is such a gold digger. Well, eat your heart out!

So, am lickin’ my thick lips while starin’ at Dinora’s beautiful boobs for what seems like eternity, then I blinked and the juicy boobs were replaced by one huge boob right in front of my eyes... those juicy milky jugs had fuckin’ morphed into one; A UNIBOOB!

What! I tried to calm myself and listen to she she had to say…here it is:

She had gone to some ill-qualify surgeon to have breast implants (though, she didn’t know it then, she had been fooled by the Dr’s white coat... the motherfucka was not a qualified plastic surgeon), the surgeon had cut through two tissue “pockets” that normally hold breast tissue which meant the implants were able to come together in the middle thereby makin’ them jugs look like a single breast, or a UNI fuckin’ BOOB!

As if walkin’ around wit’ one boob ain’t enough, Dinora will live the rest of her life with her pretty eyes open, as in, literally open... shawty’s eyes can’t close anymore because the same surgeon who blessed her a uniboob also performed a nip-tuck operation on her eyelids and she unable to fuckin’ close ‘em!

Though, a corrective has since been done on Dinora’s cowbells, her eyes will forever be open... isn’t it ironic?

I put down the printed copies of Mrs. Dinora Rodriguez’s story I got off the internet and am wonderin’, why do people put themselves through unnecessary danger tryna fix some’ that ain’t really broken. Yeah, I know there are some plastic surgeries that are necessary but alotta these chicks are jus’ fuckin’ obsessed for nothin’.