January 6
16:03
“I can’t believe they’re celebrating their three months anniversary” guy X said. “And we only just broke up like two months ago,” he continued.
Whoa! I exclaimed quietly
Can you believe that shit? He asked but I knew he wasn’t really expectin’ an answer from me so I jus’ kept quiet and shook my head like an agama lizard.
Besides, what kind of answer do you give a man who just recently found out that his now ex girlfriend had already ex’d his ass and was on to the next one while they were still kickin’ it, huh?
“How did you find out?” guy Y asked
“It was in a post she was tagged in on facebook”
“Huh, you mean your punk ass is stalkin’ you ex!” I exclaimed to myself. “Always a dumb thing to do, son”
“Admit it, you still feel something for her, don’t you?” guy Y teased
“Nooo!”
I could tell nigga was lyin’. He was jealous but I wasn’t goin’ to kick a man who’s already down by sprinklin’ salt on his injured pride. I smiled and said nothin’.
As we (me and my two friends) walked out of the close toward the main street, I checked the time again and realized the second half of the game (the third round FA tie between Arsenal and Swansea) I was hurrying to go and see was about to begin. I wanted to walk out on the whole convo and leave the two behind but then again I thought what kind of “friend” would I be if I jus’ upped and leave like that, huh?
Being the good man that I am, I slowed my pace and jus hung in there.
“Some dance to remember, some dance to forget,” guy X broke in to a song as he reached into his pocket to fish out his cell phone
“That’s hotel California,” I whispered to myself.
“So which one are you doing now?” guy Y asked.
It was as if he’d read my thought.
“c’mon, you should already know this dance is not for remembrance,” he answered wit a new confidence in his voice. “I’m here to meet some hot chick I’ve been chatting wit on BBM. It’s our first meeting and if she’s hot as her head shot she used her profile pic, then am going to milk this dance for all its worth,” he dialed a number on his phone.
“Hello, I’m on your street,” he craned his neck as he spoke into the phone, “I’m actually close to the house you described for me,”
“I can’t see you but did you see the Pajero that just drove by?”
16:06
As he spoke on the phone, I broke away from the two and move to the other side of the road.
As soon as the mysterious BBM lady came into view I took out my celly and pretended to be speaking.
Since guy X and BBM chick were meetin’ for the first time I thought I’d throw a lil unknown factor into their lil’ equation. BBM chick seein’ two guys on the phone would automatically be confused as to who the real deal was. And true to my calculation, I was right. As we drew closer, her eyes kept goin’ from one side of the road to other…
16:10
I got to the girl first; she looked at me and smiled.
I returned the favor by givin’ her what I thought was one of my best bad man smiles. Yeah, I bet y’all didn’t know I got a sack load of those, huh? Like the late Chris Wallace (Biggie Smalls) said, “Don’t bring your girls around me, true playa for real, dat’s Dobs Daddy” ah ha!
Still smilin’ she said, “Hi”
I said hey and walked on by I threw her a backward glance and the confused look on her face was priceless!
Outro
Monday
January 7
09:53
This whole account was based on a true story. The characters were real and so was the event. But the truest thing in all of this is the fact that guy X and guy Y aren’t my friends at all, matter of fact, I eavesdropped on their whole conversation!
They were jus two strangers who happened to be walkin’ in front on me on a Sunday afternoon while I was all about my Sunday afternoon bi’ness.
I hope your Mondays are goin’ good? Y’all be safe out there.
Take care of each other.
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