MORE ANGLE TO THE DANGLE

A Few Day Ago

A few ago I “walked in” on an interestin’ conversation, folks from diver backgrounds and beliefs were jaw jaw’ing on over an article they jus’ read. I’ve discovered that one of the best ways to get people talkin’ is to show them some numbers. Make assertion, back it up wit statistics (real or bogus) and throw out there for the public to feast on. Scientists and researchers always do that, don’t they? Always throwin’ up new shit, always tryna justify or debunk stuffs.

In a new report, soon to be published in the next edition of the Journal of Science, researchers from the University of Research found that you’re actually readin’ this bullshit right now. Isn’t it amazin’ how true that is? They also found that your ass jus cracked a smile right now, true or false? Guess what? the research also said that the possibility of you sharin’ this dumb ass blog wit’ ten of your friends is very high. Amazin’, right?

Back to that interestin’ convo I told y’all I walked in on, here are some of the reactions to the claims the article made.

Steve

Only 3-5 times a week!

Casey

This thing isn’t going to jerk itself.

Todd

I’ve gotta hand it to men’s health, this article makes my head explode!

Brian

Just finished!

Leonardo

Be sure to switch hands

Cyrus

Well, I haven’t been wasting my life then!

Pete

Good thing, am a devoted practitioner!

Jay

My girlfriend JILL is already proud of me.

Abid

Dude that is the best lame excuse I have ever heard!

Usman

Bad habit

Leticia

Lmao! Men!

Nicholas

Hahaha great reason to keep up the effort!

David

Why is it always some dude in a terry cloth robe sitting on the toilet? Very stereotypical! I know you can do better than that.

Marcel

Are you guys serious with that photo? Lmao!

Leo

Cheers to my health!

Joel Witte

Glad I’m doing something right

John Vasquez

As if I need another reason

Lee Nicol

I’m pulling the head off it right now. Great advice

Jeffrey Dowell

Lol! Did I just read that right?

June 26

Wednesday

03:17

Here’s what got all these people talkin’

“Why ALL men should dash dash: it makes you harder. As you age, you naturally lose muscle tone…even down there. Regular sex or dash dash works out your pelvic floor muscles to prevent erectile dysfunction and incontinence. “It keeps the angle of your dangle perky,” says Brame. Aim to (ahem) arrive 3 to 5 times a week for rock-solid results.”

Gotta love the phrase “angle to your dangle”, it cracked me the fuck up!

Outro

Ever heard of NMD? It is usually celebrated in the month of May. The first one was back in ’95. Carol Queen, an organizer of the NMD said, “we gave our head a shake and said it’s about time we fought backs”

And nah, I was even tryna get into the rightness or otherwise of the debate, some pastor recently caught flaks for daring to throw his two cents in on the issue but for me, I got no problem wit it as long as a nigga’s using it as a means toward achievin’ sexual self control, or as a part of healthy self-exploration. Where I might have bones to pick wit this situation is when it becomes an addiction, which am fairly sure it could be…not that I know firsthand.

What’s the sexual stimulation of the genital organs (of yourself or another) to the point of orgasm called again?

Oh, so some of you wanna pretend like you don’t its masturbation, huh?

Ladies and gentlemen, now that you know what this whole gig is all about, are you goin’ to jack off today?

NMD is National Masturbation Day, by the way